Purple Life

Sooo I was recently sort of seeing this guy, and neither of us were really putting in any effort (it was longish distance). 
–it should be noted that this is the week after I dyed my hair purple– 
So we decided to call it off, no hard feelings or anything but just probs not going to happen. I wasn’t upset about it or anything and I assume he also wasn’t. 
A few days later, my manager asked what happened with “that guy I was seeing.” I responded, without missing a beat, “meh, guess he decided purple just wasn’t for him.”
I cracked up, and she didn’t get the joke. Damn non-Halsey fans!! 

Passing the Legacy

Last night I introduced my beautiful, recently single, hilarious friend to Tinder (and of course the tinder drinking game). It was a RIOT! 
We immediately crafted her bio to “theater, cynicism, and dicks out for harambe” 
She got her first match, screamed, and threw her phone… 

Some other beautiful quotes from the night: 

“I just can’t drive all the way to Portland to get laid. I mean unless he pays me. Oh wait, that’s prostitution…” 

*clarae sends her first message* “don’t take this the wrong way, but I think I love you…. Your profile is pure gold!” 
…And many more. I definitely need more girls’ nights in my life!